


Poison & Wine

by jacklyne207



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Gentle Negan (Walking Dead), Negan (Walking Dead) is an automatic warning, Original Character(s), POV Original Female Character, Protective Negan (Walking Dead), Smut, Walking Dead: Here's Negan
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-09
Updated: 2017-02-28
Packaged: 2018-09-23 01:38:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9635024
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jacklyne207/pseuds/jacklyne207
Summary: [loosely based off of Here's Negan]Lucille was just a writer with a dream. And Negan was bad news from the beginning, but their attraction was undeniable. As toxic as their relationship is, neither one of them can pull away. Will they both learn to love each other, or is it too late for Negan to feel anything?"You only know what I want you to,I know everything you don't want me to." - Poison & Wine by The Civil Wars





	1. The First Meeting

**Author's Note:**

> omg this is my first ever Negan fic. I'm just in a deep phase of loving the shit out of Jeffrey Dean Morgan so I had to do it. After reading the comic "Here's Negan" I had inspiration to write this fic, but the ending won't necessarily come out the same as the comic... or maybe it will. You probably just have to read it to find out.
> 
> follow my tumblr @mattcohenss to see my inner struggle.
> 
> this fic will contain: smut, possibly abuse, possibly alcoholism *i will let you know all the warnings before each chapter

“Lucy, please come with me. I’m going to be bored out of my mind!” Lucille’s friend, Samantha, was trying to convince her to tag along to her boyfriend's baseball game. 

“If you’re going to be bored, then why are you going?” Lucille asked, sipping her coffee. The two girls sat in front of a Starbucks; drinking lattes and living the classic LA lifestyle. As a writer, Lucille frequented coffee shops around town to get work done. She was hoping to one day get her JK Rowling beginning and become a millionaire. Even though the odds of that ever happening were one in a million, she could always dream.

The thing about Samantha was that she was in denial. Lucille could see that she obviously wasn’t happy in her relationship with Steve, but it had to come off that they were “couple goals”. Sam was one of those girls that always had to be held down by a man; not having a date on Valentine’s Day was the end of the world. But Steve was boring and it was as simple as that. His hobbies included playing baseball every weekend and going to the bar with his team after every game, while throughout the week he worked at the local JiffyLube (fixing cars. How stereotypical boyish.). Sam and Steve’s everyday schedule consisted of breakfast, work, dinner, unsatisfying sex, and repeat. But Sam didn’t have the balls to break up with him.

“Because I have to,” Sam responded to Lucille’s question. “He’ll kill me if I don’t show up. Apparently he’s sure that he’s going to score a touchdown or something. If I miss it, he will be crushed.” There it is again, no balls.

Lucille let out a chuckle. “I believe that call them homeruns, but whatever. I’ll come with you. But only because I’m the best friend you’ve ever had,” Lucille narrowed her eyes at Sam and finished her coffee. “There better be cute boys there.”

The occasional hookup with a baseball player would be nice, but unlike Sam, Lucille didn’t mind being single. Sure, relationships were amazing, but they required so much time and effort. Just writing about relationships in her books made her exhausted. And last time she dated it didn’t end so well, so it was best to just avoid relationships as a whole.

Sam smiled and pulled Lucille over to her red Mini Cooper. “I’m sure cute baseball players exist. They may not be on a recreational team in California, but one can always dream,” Samantha teased. Although her boyfriend was on the team, she was probably right.

On the drive to the game, Lucille checked her emails, clicking on one that read: “In Response to Your Application!” She had to start applying for jobs because being a freelance writer didn’t exactly pay the bills. She would do anything to be able to make her own schedule and be a self made millionaire, but the cards never seemed to be on her table.

_Hi Lucille,_

_Thank you for applying for the assistant literature coach at Berkeley High School. I would like to schedule an interview with you as soon as possible, how does Monday afternoon sound?_

_Principal Grimsby_

“I finally got an interview! It’s for “assistant literature coach” at Berkeley High,” Lucille said to her friend as she quickly replied to the email. She actually liked the sound of assistant literature coach. Apparently the job entailed teaching students of all ages how to read and write. Seemed easy enough.

“Congratulations! I hope you meet some hot teachers,” Sam teased as she pulled into the parking lot of the baseball diamond. 

Lucille laughed and looked over at the men huddled around second and third base. Those were the two teams, obviously. She immediately noticed Steve, considering he was the only one she knew out of the bunch. His small frame jumped around like a teenage boy on cocaine, trying to hype up the team. It didn’t seem to be working, everyone looked more annoyed than anything.

Sam and Lucille exited the car and sat on the bleachers. Lucille’s eyes were immediately attracted to one man. He was on Steve’s team and he was much bigger than the rest of them. He definitely looked more intimidating than the entire team combined. His tight baseball tee showed off his perfectly toned muscles, and his legs seemed to go on for days. Lucille was basically salivating. It had been such a long time since she had done anything with a man...

“Steve, shut the fuck up,” his deep voice spoke as he perched the baseball bat on his shoulder. Well, that was a little harsh. Sure, Steve could be annoying as hell, but he didn’t deserve that.

Sam stiffened a bit. “I hate that guy. He’s such an ass to everyone on the team. It’s so obvious that he only cares about himself.” Sam rambled on but Lucille couldn’t keep her eyes off of him. His clean shaven face showed off his beautifully sculpted jawline, and the bruiting and pensive look just made it ten times better.

When the game started, Lucille watched as the mystery man stepped up to the plate. The pitcher of the opposite team threw the ball and he hit it with surprising force, causing the ball to fly across the field and over the fence.

“Who the hell is that guy?” Lucille asked, glancing at Sam, who was just as amazed as her. Sure, she knew he was supposedly a jackass, but there had to be more to him. Maybe he was an undercover spy, or a major league baseball star with a failed career.

“I don’t know, I think his name is Negan or something stupid like that,” Sam mumbled, ticked off that he was obviously the best on the team.

Negan, huh? That was kind of a cute name. It was certainly unique, Lucille had never heard anything like it before. But her name was unique as well. Even though all of her friends and family called her Lucy, she still loved the sound of her full name. Lucille was translated to light, and she loved that.

After a long game of not knowing what the hell was going on 90% of the time, Sam and Lucille climbed down the bleachers to congratulate Steve on his team’s win.

“Congratulations on hitting the ball once,” Lucille teased, hitting Steve’s shoulder. Lucille and Steve were what she liked to call “forced friends”. They were forced to be friends because of Sam, as she was with all of her boyfriends, so she always tried to make the best of it. If she didn’t at least try to pretend to be friends with her constant cycle of boyfriends, Sam would be crushed.

He chuckled. “I’m pretty proud of myself,” he said to Lucille before turning his full attention to Sam. “But babe, did you see that catch on the sixth inning? It was totally sweet!” That was where Lucille tuned out of the conversation. The only thing that bored her more than baseball was conversation about baseball.

She was staring at her phone when she heard someone clear their throat behind her. Turning around, she saw mystery man directly in her peripheral vision. “Can I help you?” She asked, with a hint of defensiveness in her tone. Lucille felt slightly on edge after hearing the trash talk that he spoke to the other team and his own teammates.

“I couldn’t help but notice that you were eyeing me up the entire game, doll,” he smirked.

What a jackass. She wasn’t watching him the entire time… okay, maybe that was a lie. Now that she thought of it, she didn’t remember much of the game, only his sculpted calves, toned muscles, and… shit.

“I’m sorry, did you just call me doll? My name is Lucille. Please never call me that ever again,” she shot in defence. If there was one thing she hated most in the world, it was pet names. Especially by men that don’t even know her.

“So you don’t deny it?” That smart ass smirk never left his face. When Lucille didn’t respond, he stepped closer to her. “I’m Negan.”

She took a step back nervously. He was getting into her personal space and as much as he was intoxicating to look at - she couldn’t. “It was a pleasure,” she said, sarcasm oozing from her tone.

He chuckled. “I’ll see you around, Lucille.”

She shivered when he spoke her name. Unintentionally of course. Goddammit, why did this man have such an affect on her? She quickly turned around to face Sam again, trying to forget about the small interaction. “I have to go - you know… prepare for my interview.” She tried to give her friend the subtle hint that she needed to get out of there instantly.

Sam nodded, obviously getting the message. “Okay, get in the car and I’ll be there soon,” she glared at Negan and he shot her a condescending grin.

Lucille bolted to the car and locked herself in. She couldn’t come to terms with the fact that she might’ve been crushing on a total dick. She would be better off getting back together with her shitty ex. …Okay, maybe that was overstepping it a little.

But either way, Lucille knew that she would never see him again. She could blow off Steve’s baseball games and everything would be alright. Or so she thought.


	2. Again So Soon?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucille wasn't expecting to see Negan again so soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> omg another update??? wowie i didn't give up! i'm so proud of myself!

No matter how many interviews Lucille went to, they would always make her nervous. Something about being quizzed and judged as soon as she walked into the room was extremely unsettling. But nonetheless, she made her way to Berkeley High School for her interview. She wore a white blouse with a high waisted pencil skirt, hopefully making her look both sophisticated and maybe a little sexy. She fixed her makeup in the mirror of her car in the parking lot, touching up her lipstick and powder. Once she felt presentable enough, she got out of the car and walked into the school.

The signs around the grimy looking hallways led her to the main office, where she was to meet Principal Grimsby. This school reminded her very much of the one she used to attend. Many people have fond memories of high school, but Lucille was not one of the lucky few. She remembered her toxic friendships and relationships, as well as her drunk father. Those weren’t exactly the memories she wanted to bring up before an interview, so Lucille repressed them as best as she could. 

Taking a deep breath, she opened the door to the office.

“You can tell Mr. Turner that he can go fuck himself!” A kid yelled, running out of a room within the main office, most likely the principal’s office. He charged over to the door and shoved Lucille to the side. “Watch where you’re going,” he mumbled, leaving the office and slamming the door behind him. What a warm welcome.

A man emerged from the room and sighed. “I’m sorry about that, you must be Lucille Haynes?” He approached her.

She nodded. “Yes I am, so that must make you Principal Grimsby,” she held her hand out for him to shake.

He shook her hand with a firm grasp. “Please, call me Tom. It’s a pleasure to meet you, I’m sorry it started off a little rocky. We have a teacher here that students don’t get along with very well.”

Lucille shrugged and he led her to his office. “No worries, kids will be kids.”

Tom nodded and pulled out a chair for her. “Please, have a seat.”

Lucille sat down across from his desk and watched him closely. He was tall and lean, and not intimidating at all. He looked more like your local neighbourhood grocery store clerk, rather than a high school principal. He wore a tweed jacket and his grey hair slicked back out of his face. His wrinkles showed the stress of the job waring him out. 

The interview consisted of pretty standard questions. Have you ever worked at a high school before? What would you do if a student refused to listen to your instruction? Blah blah blah? Blah? Blah blah blah blah? Lucille felt like she was in the zone, like she had this interview in the bag.

At least it seemed that way until the door swung open. “Whatever that jackass kid said was a lie,” a familiar voice strained.

Lucille turned around to give whoever this asshole was the biggest death glare of his life, but she couldn’t stop her jaw from dropping when she saw who it was. It was Negan. What the hell was a butch baseball player doing in a high school? Unless he had failed senior year for the last thirty years of his life, Lucille couldn’t think of a better option.

“Negan, please calm down,” Tom put his head in his hands, obviously showcasing the stress that this man was putting on him. “Skylar simply stated that you were being unfair. That you were throwing dodgeballs at the kids who didn’t perform to your standards,” he explained in a cool tone. Skylar must’ve been that kid that bumped into Lucille earlier. He probably deserved a good dodgeball to the head.

Negan was about to respond when he suddenly glanced at Lucille. “You look familiar, doll,” he smirked.

She suddenly felt herself go red with rage and probably a little anxiety. Even at a time like this, he seemed to find pleasure in teasing her. “Lucille,” she managed to muster.

“Oh yes, the sassy little brunette from our game on Friday. You should’ve seen her Tommy, such a fireball,” his voice seemed to melt into her body as his gaze never left her. He was such an asshole… why was she so attracted to that?

“You know each other?” Tom suddenly spoke.

Lucille cleared her throat and looked at him. “Barely. We met briefly at my friend’s baseball game on Friday,” she tried to keep her composure but her voice wavered.

Tom nodded. “Alright, Negan, feel free to leave now. I’m almost finished, and then I will discuss consequences with you further.”

Negan sighed and slammed the door as he left. Moody one, wasn’t he?

“Well Lucille,” Tom started. “I would say this interview went very well, despite our little interruption. I would like to offer you the job.”

“Really?” Lucille smiled. “That would be wonderful, thank you.”

“It’s my pleasure.”

-

After discussing details about her job, Lucille left the high school confident. She had gotten through the interview with only a minor hiccup and was officially starting her new job next Monday. Lucille decided to reward herself with a trip to her local Starbucks, even though it technically couldn’t be classified as a reward if she already went there every day.

She sat in her favourite seat by the window and watched as people walked past. In California, people either seemed like they had nowhere to go and were just wandering aimlessly, or they were so fucking busy they would stomp on anyone that got in their way. Lucille preferred the latter, but she had to admit that she had her days when it seemed like the Earth would stop turning if she didn’t get to her destination on time.

“What a coincidence,” a deep voice spoke from behind her. By now it was expected that it was Negan.

Lucille sighed and turned around. “Hello, doll. Are you following me now, or what?” she teased, her voice laced with annoyance. She called him "doll" as an attempted verbal slap in the face, but it ended up just making her feel awkward. Why did the word sound so much better coming out of his mouth?

He chuckled and sat down next to her. “We’ve got a sassy one here.”

“I don’t think I gave you permission to sit next to me,” she shot, a smile threatening to creep onto her face. Don’t do it, Lucille. Don’t give him the satisfaction.

He smirked and moved closer to her. “What are you drinking? A vanilla ice cream dream latte with extra fuckin’ sprinkles?” He continued to tease.

“No, actually. It’s a coffee with cream and sugar.”

“Mine’s black, so looks like I win.”

Lucille rolled her eyes. Being with him always turned into some sort of competition. “What are you doing at Starbucks anyway? Are you here to pick up chicks or something?” She asked, keeping her composure, although it was merely impossible.

“There’s only one chick in here I want, and she’s playing hard to get,” he growled into her ear.

Now that sent a shiver down her spine. How was she supposed to respond to that? At first he was playful and then all of the sudden his voice was smoother than butter? “Well then maybe you should give it up,” she said, her voice suddenly small. She was no longer oozing with sass and confidence. He had gotten to her again.

“Not until she agrees to go on a fuckin’ date with me.”

She finally looked at him, surprised. “A date?” She was expecting something more like, “come to my apartment and let me fuck your brains out,” not a date. That was something a gentlemen would say, besides the swearing of course.

He nodded. “Let me spoil you with dinner and a movie.”

“I’m sorry Negan, but we’re going to be colleagues soon. It wouldn’t be professional of me to… go on a date with you,” she looked away from him. She wanted to say yes, but it couldn’t happen. But what if he was sweet once she got to know him? No, Lucille. It can’t happen.

He placed his hand under her chin and forced her to look at him. “When do you start?” He asked.

“Monday,” she murmured.

“I’ll take you out Friday night. We won’t be coworkers until Monday, so I don’t see a problem.” He took his phone out of his pocket and handed it to her. “Now please give me your goddamn phone number,” he smiled.

Lucille sighed in defeat and programmed her number into his phone. He was so cute and persistent. What harm could come from that? 

She gave his phone back to him and he smiled. “I’ll see you on Friday, Lucille.”


	3. How Long Has It Been?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As Lucille prepares for her date with Negan, the anxiety starts to settle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay im excited now because im finally starting to settle into the works of ao3 and writing fanfic again. this chapter i wanted to focus a bit more on getting to know Lucille, and it also has some nsfw language in it because im feisty. i hope you enjoy!
> 
>  

“You haven’t been on a date in two years?” Sam screeched in Lucille’s ear. “Wait… when was the last time you had sex? My dear, Lucy! Are you a born again virgin?” Sam had been teasing Lucille about her confession for a good five minutes now and it was getting old. It wasn’t her fault that she had no ambition to go out and sleep with boys.

“In case you forgot, my last boyfriend kind of fucked me up a little bit,” Lucille rolled her eyes. “I haven’t had sex, and I’ve barely talked to men in general in two years.”

“Oh yeah… that lesbian phase was pretty dark,” Sam recalled.

Lucille threw a pillow at her. She NEVER talked about the lesbian phase. It was a year and a half ago and the worst three months of her life. She refused to bring it up ever again. “Please shut up and help me pick out what to wear.”

She was trying to prepare for her date with Negan tomorrow, but nerves were getting the best of her. The past three days had been filled with flirty text messages from Negan as well as anxiety-ridden text messages towards her friend. Lucille still recalled the first time Negan texted her.

_It was Tuesday night and she sat in her bedroom, watching old reruns of Friends. She was also eating a tub of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream and a pizza… but that detail was unimportant. She felt her phone buzz as Ross was professing his love to Rachel. She glanced at it and noticed the unknown number. She opened the message._

_**Thinking of you ;)** _

_She knew immediately who it was. The flirty remark caused volcanoes to erupt in her stomach. The man had guts to text her at all. And what could he possibly be thinking about? She knew it was sexual, but he had only seen her a grand total of three times, how could he already be having wet dreams about her?_

_Lucille contemplated giving him an answer. What was she supposed to say? “Oh yeah, I’m thinking about you too, and how every time I see you, I want to ride your face until the sun sets.” Or maybe, “Please just come over and fuck me already. I haven’t had sex in ages.” Let’s start with be more subtle than that._

_She settled with: **Patience, dear.** What a fucking dumb thing to say, Lucille! Dear? Are you twelve? Has he been your husband for sixty years? She was a fucking mess. Why did he have this effect on her?_

_A couple minutes later there was a reply._

_**Patience is not one of my virtues. What are you up to right now?** _

_God, how was he sexy through text? How could a human muster up that much sex power?_

_**I’m actually really busy. My friend’s Ben and Jerry are over and we’re watching tv** , Lucille replied. Could you be more of a nerd, Lucille? Her subconscious raged. Your friends Ben and Jerry? What a fucking sad lunatic you are. Nevertheless, Negan’s reply was timely._

_**It’s a damn shame I’m missing out on that fucking threesome.** _

_Lucille felt herself biting her lip to suppress a smile. **I’ll see you on Friday, Negan. What movie are we going to see?**_

_**It’s a surprise, doll. Give me your address and I’ll pick you up at 7.** _

And now here she was on Thursday night, preparing herself for whatever was to come tomorrow evening. She had already done a relaxing face mask, and now Samantha was being extremely difficult and not helpful at all. She continued to throw lingerie at her stating, “wear this!” Or “ooh, he’ll enjoy ripping this off your body!”

“I’m not going to have sex with him, Sam,” Lucille rolled her eyes and began to rummage through her closet. “Just because I haven’t had sex in two years, doesn’t mean I’m craving a dick in me at any given opportunity.” Lucille definitely wasn’t into one night stands at this point in her life, especially with a soon-to-be coworker. Although her less than practical imagination wanted to crawl all over anything with a penis, her brain would always stop her.

“Live on the edge, Lucy! Take a risk, go commando,” Samantha taunted. Lucille swore her friend only thought with her vagina.

“Tomorrow will not be that kind of risk,” Lucille took a black dress out of her closet and held it up to her thin frame. “What about this?” She asked, glancing up at Sam.

“It’s cute, you’ll have to go braless though,” Sam responded with a wink. Although she was totally ridiculous, she was also right. Wearing a bra with the thin spaghetti straps and the low back of this dress would be too risky. She hated to comply to one of Samantha’s many fantasies, but this was the only suitable thing in her closet.

She placed the dress on a chair in the corner of her bedroom. “Now just because I’m listening to you, it doesn’t mean that there will be any boob groping or nipple pinching taking place tomorrow night!” Lucille quickly reassured her friend.

“What a shame. I’m sure Negan is probably into that kind of stuff,” Samantha frowned and laid back on Lucille’s bed. “He seems pretty kinky.”

Suddenly Lucille recalled back to yesterday morning when she decided to cyber-stalk Negan. Looking up someone before you go on a date with them is either extremely beneficial or extremely detrimental. One time, several years ago, Lucille looked up her blind date to discover that he had just gotten out of prison for child pornography. She quickly called in sick to that one.

_Typing in Negan’s name into the google search bar was a regret waiting to happen, but Lucille’s inner demons were stubborn and wanted bathroom mirror selfies this instant. However, she did not receive any bathroom mirror selfies._

_His Facebook and Twitter pages were pretty bare. They mostly talked about Major League Baseball and other sports that Lucille didn’t care about. She scrolled through his friends and clicked on a few pages, revealing some of his family members. There were pictures of him surrounded by family, as well as a few adorable pictures and videos of him teaching nieces and nephews how to throw a football and how to skip rocks on the lake._

_This wasn’t a mistake because was she found was bad, this was a mistake because what she found was completely adorable. It was also a mistake because she was being a totally creepy stalker. She would definitely never speak of this moment out loud._

“Hello? Are you having kink dreams or something?” Samantha waved a hand in front of Lucille’s face. Oh right, Samantha thought he was kinky. While her internet research proved inconclusive, Lucille knew that everyone had their own secrets in the bedroom, including herself.

Lucille shook her head. “No, sorry. I’m just really nervous. What if he proves to be an asshole?” She bit her lip. She had to admit that this idea was floating around in her mind. Every time she had run into Negan, it wasn’t necessarily a positive experience. He was either trash talking his opponents, scrutinizing a student, or just setting off an overall douche aura. But there was something about him… Lucille thought that maybe he could be different.

Sam shrugged. “If he turns out to be an asshole, at least you’ll have a good story. Listen kids, this is why you don’t go on dates with complete strangers that outwardly stare at your tits all day,” she teased.

Lucille shot her a death glare. “Okay Sam, I think that’s enough. You can tell me that you told me so when the date is over.”

“Oh, I plan to.”

-

The next day, Lucille got up earlier than she needed to so she could start getting ready. The truth was that she couldn’t sleep at all, anticipating the events that were to come. There were so many possible outcomes, and it didn’t only make her excited, it also gave her torturing anxiety.

Lucille had grown up with anxiety. She was always the kid that preferred to sit in the corner and read, rather than try to make friends. Her parents decided that she was probably just shy until she got to middle school. That was when the panic attacks started happening. She would be shaking, sweating, and crying in anticipation of a presentation. One time she actually passed out when the teacher didn’t give her any other option.

Her father wasn’t much of a help, he was drunk all the time anyway. He would usually just say, “build a bridge and get over it. It’s only teenage girl hormones.” Those were the moments that she was grateful for her mother. Lucille’s mother must’ve been an angel. At least she always was in Lucille’s eyes. She listened to her, and took her to therapy, and talked to her teachers. Without her, she probably would’ve dropped out of high school.

Speaking of her mother, Lucille immediately knew that she had to make a phone call. They hadn’t spoken in a few days and she already had so much to tell her. Picking up the phone before even getting out of bed, she dialled her old home phone number. It was now only her mom and dad living there.

“Hello?” Her mother’s chipper voice spoke on the other end.

“Hi mom, it’s me. I have some exciting news,” she felt herself smile. Her mom didn’t sound upset, which meant that her father was probably still going to his AA meetings. After Lucille turned sixteen and he almost killed her in a car accident, he started to smarten up a little bit. He was going to Alcoholics Anonymous. Although he was still an emotionless bastard, at least he was starting to own up to his actions.

“I’m excited to hear it,” her mom persisted.

“Well, I got a job in a high school. It’s as an assistant literature coach. I basically just get to teach kids how to read, but I’m pretty excited.” When Lucille talked to her mother, she felt like a totally different person. She felt like she could be a child again, if only for a mere five minute phone call.

“That’s amazing, sweetie! I can’t wait to hear how it goes. How are things looking in the men department?” Ah, there it was. The question that made Lucille move across the state to be away from her family. The question that every time she would go to a family dinner, someone would utter it. The question that made her relationship with her mother no longer childhood innocence.

“Well… I met this guy. And we’re going on a date tonight,” she twiddled her thumbs nervously. She didn’t want to give too many details about him, especially since she didn’t know too many herself.

“That’s so good! I’m so proud of you! It’s been such a long time, I can’t wait for you to introduce him to us! You know, your grandmother has been pestering me for weeks about when you’re going to bring a boy home. Or come home at all, that is.”

Lucille audibly sighed. “Mom… it’s not like that. It’s just a date. I don’t really think he’s a “meet the parents and suffer through my grandmother’s agonizing questions about circumcision” type of guy.”

“Then what type of guy is he? I hope he isn’t a Conner type of guy, because you know how that will end up, Lucille.”

Connor was Lucille’s ex. The ex that she never spoke of because it brought up too much pain. Tears stung her eyes as she thought about something as little as his name.

“Mom… please,” she managed. What happened to the happy-go-lucky conversation she was expecting? Parents always knew how to turn the tables. To turn everything into a lecture. To turn happiness into an anxious ball in the pit of your stomach.

“I’m sorry, darling. You know how I feel. Anyway, I hope you have a good night. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do, don’t stay out too late, make sure your phone is fully charged and just be safe. I love you.”

“I love you too, mom,” Lucille said before abruptly hanging up. Enough of that. It was time to get ready.

Lucille had some breakfast before hopping into the shower. She shaved everywhere that she would rather not grow hair, and lathered her body with the body washes and lotions she only used for special occasions. As much as Lucille didn’t care about anything… she also cared too much about a lot of things. Like how she smelled. For instance, she knew the day would consist of a lot of stress sweat, which in her opinion, was the worst type of sweat that existed. It smelled the worst, and that was a problem in of itself. To combat that, Lucille used body oils and a strong antiperspirant. You could say she was a bit of an expert in the “that’s a dumb reason to be anxious” department.

After her intense shower routine, she did her hair and makeup, which took up another two hours of her time so that everything could be perfect. She made sure her eyeliner was perfectly straight and even, and her lips were perfectly plump and just a tad overdrawn. Even though Negan would probably be staring at her ass and tits the entire night because that’s what men do, she could at least show off for the random pedestrians that would accidentally catch her gaze.

Time seemed to go by faster than Lucille anticipated, because by the time she finished getting ready it was already 6:30. She had killed an entire day in an anxiety daze alone.

She spent the next half an hour reading a book to help calm her nerves. Before she knew it, she could hear the buzzing of the doorbell. Negan was here.


	4. The First Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucille and Negan go on their first date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this chapter took so long to get up! I was having a bit of writer's block, but it's finally done yay! (i mean it's not like anyone cares lmao)
> 
> if you want to see more updates on my daily feels struggles, follow me on tumblr at [mattcohenss](http://www.angelboydean.co.vu) or on my jdm blog [preciousjdm](http://www.preciousjdm.tumblr.com)

Lucille made her way downstairs to the entrance of her apartment building. She saw Negan standing in the foyer waiting for her. He was casual in a white shirt, leather jacket, and black pants, yet he still looked extremely sexy. Wouldn’t it be great to just throw on any old outfit and look amazing every time?

Negan smiled as Lucille opened the door and she couldn’t help but smile back. “You look fucking stunning in that dress, doll,” he kissed her hand and led her outside. On a normal occasion, she would’ve told him that her fucking name was Lucille, but for some reason it seemed endearing today. Negan must’ve given her a love potion or something, because her feelings for him seemed to be developing rapidly.

“Thank you,” she managed to murmur in a small voice.

Negan led her to a beat up red pickup truck and she felt herself laugh.

“What’s so funny?” He asked, looking at her with an amused expression as he opened the door for her. “You think Bertha is a laughing matter?” He teased.

“Bertha?” She laughed even harder. “I just think it’s cute. That a guy like you has a truck like this.”

He rolled his eyes and closed the door before walking around the front and getting into the driver’s seat. “I drive a motorcycle most of the year, I only bring Bertha out for special occasions,” he continued to speak in a teasing tone as he started the truck.

“Wow, I feel special,” Lucille laughed.

“You fucking should, doll. I don’t bring Bertha out for just anyone,” he winked as he began to drive to the restaurant that was still unknown to Lucille.

She felt the stereotypical butterflies erupt in her stomach. She felt as if she could fly, fuelled on the compliments Negan was giving her. It seemed like forever since someone genuinely complimented her appearance. She stared out the window as the Los Angeles lights swam past them. Only a few moments later, they pulled into a cute 24 hour diner.

“This place has helped me with my hangovers on numerous occasions,” Lucille smiled and finally glanced at Negan again. Every time she looked at him she felt as if fireworks would explode from her stomach.

He smiled back, showcasing his gorgeous dimples as he parked the car. “The same for me.” He turned off the truck and got out, coming around and opening the door for Lucille.

She climbed out of the vessel and walked with him into the diner. It was just a small restaurant, with a black and white checkered floor and red booths lining the wall. It felt as if they were walking straight into the sixties. Lucille recalled on her drunk trips to this place with Sam, the floors would always make her dizzy. She smiled at the memory now, back when she seemed so carefree.

Negan led Lucille to a booth in the corner of the restaurant, secluded from anyone else in the restaurant. Soon, a middle aged woman in an apron came over to their table. “Good evening, I’m Casie and I’ll be taking your order,” she glanced at Negan and smiled. “I haven’t seen you in a while, I barely recognized you!” She smiled and leaned over and gave him a hug.

He smiled back at her. “Sorry for abandoning you, Casie. I’ve been a little preoccupied,” he winked at Lucille and she bit her lip nervously.

“I see that,” Casie smiled and looked over to Lucille again. “It’s nice to meet you, I’m an old friend of Negan’s. Can I get y’all anything to drink?”

Negan had friends? That were girls? Lucille was so baffled by this that she almost forgot to answer the question. “I’ll have a vanilla milkshake and a water please,” she smiled politely.

“Mm, she has good taste. I’ll have chocolate, vanilla isn’t really my style,” Negan smirked.

“Oh, I know,” Casie winked before leaving to get the drinks.

Lucille shifted in her seat uncomfortably. They were totally talking about sex. “So um… how do you two know each other?” She asked, fiddling with her thumbs under the table.

“We used to have sex,” Negan said, nonchalantly.

Well… she wasn’t expecting him to be that upfront about it. “Have sex as in… date? Or just… have sex?” Lucille seemed to sound dumber and dumber by the second.

He chuckled. “Just sex. No strings attached. She ended it after she found someone new,” he shrugged.

“This is a weird conversation to be having on a date,” Lucille admitted.

“I’m not a very traditional man, Lucille,” his eyes darkened with lust.

She opened her mouth to respond but nothing came out. How do you respond to that? Before she could muster up something that would probably make her sound like a complete idiot, Casie arrived with the milkshakes.

“Have y’all decided on what you’re going to eat?” Casie asked politely.

“I’m going to have the cheeseburger with fries,” Lucille smiled and handed off her menu, trying to act as if she wasn’t still baffled by Negan’s response.

“I’ll have the usual,” Negan smiled and handed off his menu as well. Of course he had a usual. He had sex with the waitress. He probably had sex with all of the waitresses.

Lucille took a sip of her water as Casie left. “So, how long have you been a teacher for?” She asked, thinking it would be best to change the subject.

“About four years. I’m a gym teacher so I don’t really count as an actual teacher,” he shrugged. “I hate those fucking kids but it pays the bills.”

Lucille laughed and shook her head. “You don’t hate kids. You can pretend that you do but if you really hated them, you wouldn’t volunteer to spend five days a week with them.”

“Looks like you see right through me, doll,” he took a sip of his milkshake, not a hint of teasing on his face. Was he being serious? This man would always be a mystery.

Negan and Lucille carried on having a casual conversation until their food arrived. After the initial first date jitters, Lucille felt a lot more comfortable around him. He seemed like he was willing to listen instead of just talking over her like a lot of men would.

Lucille rubbed her hands together as Casie placed the cheeseburger in front of her. “This looks delicious,” she smiled. She looked at Negan’s plate to see steak and French fries. It seemed kind of out of place, but so did Negan. “Steak and French fries?” She questioned as Casie left them to eat.

He smiled and ate a French fry. “Yes, ma’am.”

“Well, sir, I’m about to show you something worth trying,” Lucille smiled and grabbed a French fry. She swirled the fry around her milkshake and ate it.

Negan looked at her confusedly. “A French fry dipped in ice cream?”

She nodded and dipped another French fry. She held it in his face. “Try it,” she smiled.

He looked at her hand that was holding the fry, then looked back into her eyes. He then took fry out of her hands with his teeth and ate it. “It tastes like a fucking soggy potato and vanilla ice cream.”

“But it’s a fucking delicious soggy potato and vanilla ice cream,” Lucille smiled and ate another. She tried this trick a few years ago when she was drunk and now whenever she felt heartbroken or depressed she would just make some French fries and dip them in a carton of ice cream.

Negan chuckled and shook his head. “You sure are something, Lucille.”

Lucille bit her lip. “Just wait until you really get to know me.”

-

After their dinner, Negan drove Lucille to the nearby movie theatre. Lucille was nervous to see what movie he had decided that they were going to see. She didn’t doubt that his taste in movies was probably as great as his taste in everything else, but it was still terrifying to think about the fact that she had no idea what was going to happen next.

Negan led her into the theatre and up to the ticket stand. “Two tickets for Cabin in the Woods, please,” Negan smiled. Oh, he was trying to scare her.

He bought the tickets and then led Lucille over to the concession stand.

“Cabin in the Woods, huh?” Lucille asked, crossing her arms over her chest. “Are you trying to scare me?”

“Depends, do you scare easily?” He purred in her ear.

She shivered. “As a matter of fact, I do not. I love scary movies.” Lucille knew what his plan was. He was going to take her to the scary movie and get her to be so horrified that she would be hiding in his chest through the entire thing. And although she was extremely anxious, horror movies were exciting for her. Like a rollercoaster of adrenaline and suspense. Of course, after the movie she would always barricade herself away from the world and be paranoid about being murdered, but in those two hours of watching the movie, she was carefree.

“We’ll see about that,” Negan winked before he began ordering the popcorn.

After getting popcorn and drinks, they walked to their designated theatre and sat down in the back row. Negan probably got these seats in attempt to make out with Lucille, but there was no way she was going to give in that easily.

A few minutes into the movie, Lucille felt Negan’s arm drape around her shoulders. She didn’t pull away… but that was as far as she was willing to take it. Although her subconscious wanted to hop on that dick immediately, she couldn’t. They were about to be coworkers… it wouldn’t be right.

Lucille more or less enjoyed the movie, until it started to fill with jump scares. She felt herself jump and cling onto Negan’s jacket, which was the exact opposite of what she wanted to be doing.

“You enjoying this?” Negan murmured.

Lucille wasn’t sure if he was referencing the movie or the feeling of his warm body against hers…. “Mhm,” she replied, packing more popcorn into her mouth.

He chuckled and held onto her a little tighter.

By the end of the movie, Lucille was a lot closer to Negan. Their thighs were touching and she was leaned against his shoulder, but she could confidently say that she didn’t embarrass herself too much. She wasn’t some helpless girl that was crawling in his lap.

The drive back home was quiet, with the occasional small talk. It was a weird feeling, but Lucille didn’t want the night to end. She felt so carefree when she was with Negan.

“I had a great time tonight, thank you,” Lucille smiled as Negan led her up to her apartment.

“No problem, doll. It was a pleasure,” he kept a hand on the small of her back.

“What are we going to do now? We’re coworkers on Monday,” she stopped in front of her door. She knew it would be a bad idea to go on this date. She was going to develop feelings for him and then she would never be able to date him ever again.

“I don’t think we need to worry about that. Whatever happens, happens,” he held her chin between his thumb and pointer finger. “But just know… I want you to be mine.”

Lucille bit her lip. “Okay… I’m going to go inside now.” She kissed his cheek. “Thank you for everything,” she said before entering her apartment and closing the door behind her. Oh no… what was she supposed to do now?

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed! please comment to let me know if you liked it or not <3


End file.
